28 Thoughts I Had Watching "The Real Housewives of Orange County" for the First Time - Episode 7

This post is part of a series. Here are Carrie's thoughts on Episode 6.

All this nonsense about Emily's weird husband is really coming to a head. What new and old friendships will it tear apart. Also, where the hell is Whoop-It-Up Vicki?!

1.     We open with Shannon hanging with her hot personal trainer. I want an attractive man to show up to my house with a pre-workout smoothie with amino acids and a workout regimen. There is a man who lives in my house. But he usually brings me Chipotle (#notanad) and kombucha. Wait, maybe I am ok with my way.

2.     Also, are we supposed to be drinking amino acids? I can’t keep up.

3.     Shannon’s plank form is damn near perfect.

4.     The pony look Shannon’s rocking in the confessional interview is fierce.

5.     She is working out in spanx!!!! What is even happening?

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6.     Shannon starts by telling her trainer that she wants to be healthy. Awesome, great goal and attitude! Then, she tells him that she wants to be able to put a dress on. Damnit, we veered back to weird body shaming territory. I understand that Shannon is struggling with her own stuff, and I won’t pretend to understand everything she’s gone through, so whatever she needs to do to get back to a good headspace, then that’s her prerogative. But, let’s be crystal clear, a woman does not earn the right to rock a good dress by working out, nor is she more worthy of said dress because of what her body looks like. Thank you for coming to my TED Talk. 

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7.     Tamra going into this dinner with Emily’s husband like

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8.     Eddie orders a dirty gin martini. Eddie and I just became best friends.

9.     Emily says her husband is sarcastic. He says he’s being serious. I feel like this is a case of when he tells us who he is, we should believe him.

10.  Kelly’s daughter is damn right about mixing your dry ingredients first, then adding wet. I’ve seen GBBO.

11.  Kelly trying to teach her daughter to appreciate what she has is noble, but seems like a losing battle given the lifestyle these women lead.

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12.  Vicki says, “I’m a marriage girl.” She makes it sound like a hobby. In the way that other women go to yoga or take up knitting. Vicki gets married.

13.  I continue to LOVE Gina, and the fact that she points out how #OCproblems it is that Emily’s Tesla battery ran out.

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14.  In the Shannon/Emily situation, I am Switzerland. On one hand, Shannon and the other women seem to be right that Emily’s husband was kind of a jerk. On the other hand, Emily’s right that they should not be making assumptions about her marriage.

15.  I am having a hard time articulating my feelings about Kelly showing up to work in a soup kitchen in a holey sweatshirt and a knit hat, but it is questionable at best. 

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16.  I didn’t realize it until now, but I someday aspire to be Tamra’s Mom in the moment where she announces that her new boyfriend smokes weed.

17.  Tamra’s reaction to her mother’s announcement may be my favorite moment in this series so far.

18.  Okay I am going to be go all lawyer for a second. I completely agree that $30,000/month sounds absolutely ridiculous. For many people, that is an annual salary. But in no way is Shannon’s ex-husband “getting screwed.” Family courts, California included, use a specific calculation to determine spousal and child support. The calculation is based on the parent’s income, and it takes into consideration raising the children such that their lifestyle does not need to change. Divorce is traumatic for children – keeping them in their same schools, neighborhoods, and activities (even if those schools, neighborhoods, and activities are extravagant) goes a long way toward minimizing the adjustment to their new normal. Stop acting like a parent supporting his children, in the same way he would have done if they had stayed married, is some great travesty. Thank you for coming to my second TED Talk.

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19.  Tamra wants to know what happened to the whoop-it-up-Vicki. I agree. I was promised far more shenanigans when this endeavor started.

20.  Tamra adheres to my mother’s school of thought on sports – dress the part, and you’ll figure the rest out. The first time we ever went skiing, my mother bought a head to toe new ski wardrobe. She looked fantastic on those bunny hills.

21.  Are there other people on this course because I’m sure they are thrilled to be sharing the course with these nuts?

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22.  Thank you, producers for answering my question. These other golfers look none too pleased.

23.  Is this edited chronologically? Did Emily really wait until they were all good and liquored up to confront Shannon?

24.  There are a lot of good leather jackets on this show. I want a good leather jacket.

25.  This situation about what Shannon said about Emily’s husband is an epic misunderstanding. Emily heard “abuse”. No one actually used that word. That’s been cleared up. I think we can all move on, right?

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26.  I don’t like Gina & Emily fighting. These newbies need to stick together to survive this insanity. Ok, they fixed it. I am so relieved. Their reactions near the end make me feel like this got escalated for TV.

27.  Tamra is frustrated with Shannon for things that have nothing to do with the situation related to Emily’s husband, and she just used this opportunity.

28.  Oh man, the coming scenes at this red party (?) look fantastic